Three Decades Old
Life has been so crazy this past month, I feel like I've been in a world of to-do lists, suitcases and boxes!
May has been a transitional month of getting ready to move apartments, (just down the street!) to traveling to Arizona, New York and Iceland, to today, which is my 30th birthday. Talk about change!
I love to celebrate birthdays - other people's. Not so much mine.
And as I approached turning 30 (holy sh*t!!) I was really weirded out! A number that seemed so far away is here! And it ain't getting any younger!
While I was in Iceland I was thinking about being three decades old and how I didn't feel like I had it all together. I can vividly remember being in my young teens and meeting people in their thirties and they just oozed stability. They all had glasses and cardigans and tailored jeans with shoes that didn't have a scrape on them -- my memory may be a bit fuzzy haha! -- but that is the picture I held on to for so long of a 30 year old. And before leaving on our trip I looked in the mirror and saw someone who was the opposite of stable. I mean for pete sakes I had cut myself shaving my legs while I pondered ordering thai food for the third time that week.
Last week we drove along the coast of Snaefellsness, Iceland, and saw these horses. We stopped to pet them and watch them for a while. I looked around the fields and the moss covered lava rocks around me and it just hit me. These Justin Bieber-looking mammals were so happy, so free and were just loving life. Galloping here and there in a farm where there were no worries. Life is freaking beautiful and when you stop for just a second and truly, I mean truly, appreciate where you are and how far you've come, you will find it - happiness in the present.
Life moves so fast and you can either fight it and struggle and compare yourself to everyone around you, living in negativity and stress OR! you can stop where you are, close your eyes, take a big breath and open your eyes to see all the things you are blessed with. If you don't like what you see, you can change it! You are in control of your life and how you see it!
In my case, yes, we are moving - but not many people can afford to move!! Yes, we were stressed the eff out getting ready to travel - but not many people can even leave the county, more or less the country!! Yes, I am a year older - but so many people don't get to live to 30.
All of this to say that I am excited about being thirty and I am going into this year and decade with more clarity and appreciation than I ever had in my twenties. I'm so thankful to be able to share pictures of my face with a few eye wrinkles on them because I smile so much. I'm so thankful to have a platform where I can write and express myself with a social world that is receptive to what I have to say. I'm so thankful for my family, friends, yogis, instagram friends and even strangers I have become so close with.